Days of Gratitude Days: 8-12

I may not be that good at doing this on a daily bases, but I know that I am thinking about it.
This past week has been a time to really reflect on things to be grateful.
We have food, we have working appliances, we have a roof over our heads...BUT, there is always a but in there...on Thursday there was a shooting on our street...exactly where the girls normally play with a neighbor girl.
The person shot was a 19 year old pregnant girl that lives across the street from us.
The area we live in New Orleans is one of the worst places in the city...we did not know this when we moved in, but I had my feelings. The rent is cheap, but now we know why.
This street has seen a lot of blood spilled, and I am now very afraid that it may become even more familiar to our family.
People can say to me that it was not your family, and that you are safe, but those words are hollow, because it can all change in a split second. I have learned this the hard way.
We are now living in a place that I never wanted my children in...the Southerners version of South Central.
All I can think about is one of my favorite songs by Natalie Merchant

Carnival
Album: Tigerlily


Well, I've walked these streets
A virtual stage, it seemed to me
Makeup on their faces
Actors took their places next to me

Well, I've walked these streets
In a carnival, of sights to see
All the cheap thrill seekers vendors and the dealers
They crowded around me

Have I been blind have I been lost
Inside myself and my own mind
Hypnotized, mesmerized by what my eyes have seen?

Well, I've walked these streets
In a spectacle of wealth and poverty
In the diamond markets the scarlet welcome carpet
That they just rolled out for me

And I've walked these streets
In the madhouse asylum they can be
Where a wild-eyed misfit prophet
On a traffic island stopped and he raved of saving me
(rpt 1)

Have I been blind, have I been lost
Have I been blind, have I been mean
Have I been strong

Hypnotized, mesmerized by what my eyes have seen
In that great street carnival, in that carnival?


Yes I still have a lot to be gratful for, but I am still going to want more, and to make it better for them. That is one of the main reasons for us moving back to Tacoma, for me it seems safer, and it is home.