Today has been an emotional day for me. I learned that a friend of mine lost her husband, he was in his late 30's, they just moved into a new home, they have 3 children, and another on the way.
How is that life can change that fast for someone? How can it be that one moment so many wonderful things are happening, and the very next you have lost your best friend?
I do not even know what to say to comfort her, "sorry" sounds so wrong, because "sorry" is for when you break something, or make a mistake...but when your best friend, the person you loved, and shared your life with is taken suddenly from you, and your children, sorry does not even come close!
I can not even imagine what she is going through right now, I know it must be like a nightmare that you can not wake from, that everything you knew id gone just like that!
This has made me stop and think about everything...presents for Christmas are now not so important...if I have the people I love with me, that is all that really matter, and what I want my children to learn from this.
It is getting to me even more because of the fact that he died on the 6th year anniversary of the passing of my Mom, December 11th. Her death was not a surprise, but a death just the same.
Rest in peace Ed, you will be missed, and we are sending so much love to your family!
This blog is from a Homeschool Mom, who is an artist, living now in the Pacific Northwest.
Tuesday, December 13, 2011
Friday, December 2, 2011
Tis the season
It is that time again when parents all over the world hear their children talking about what they want for Christmas, or in our home Yule.
This is when many parents start to stress, and worry about if they can afford these things that their children so want.
I am one of those people, we are a single income family, not totally by choice, but it is there. We really do not have a 'full-time' income.
Why do we do this, and why do we allow ourselves to be stressed year after year?
I know that many will stay that it is because we love our children, but I must ask, Do we really think that our children only feel that we love them if we buy that IPod touch?
I know better, but I also know that I love it when they open that special birthday, and you see it, that wonderful, magical look in their eyes, the look of "I really got it" The happiness you know that they feel at that second.
So I ask, how do you do that when you don not have the money to obtain the "it" present?
This is my quest this year to find a way to give them the happiness, but without needing that much money!
This is when many parents start to stress, and worry about if they can afford these things that their children so want.
I am one of those people, we are a single income family, not totally by choice, but it is there. We really do not have a 'full-time' income.
Why do we do this, and why do we allow ourselves to be stressed year after year?
I know that many will stay that it is because we love our children, but I must ask, Do we really think that our children only feel that we love them if we buy that IPod touch?
I know better, but I also know that I love it when they open that special birthday, and you see it, that wonderful, magical look in their eyes, the look of "I really got it" The happiness you know that they feel at that second.
So I ask, how do you do that when you don not have the money to obtain the "it" present?
This is my quest this year to find a way to give them the happiness, but without needing that much money!
Friday, November 11, 2011
Thursday, November 10, 2011
When to roar
At the start of this new school year we decided to place Evan in the online k-12 program called WAVA, this was done with much thought and mixed feelings.
At first he was doing well, doing his work, and then it was like a wall came up, and it all just stopped. Evan stopped logging on, and stopped completing assignments. Emails, and call ensured, and then came the threats that they would remove him from the program.
This is not a happy Mommy. I am not a tough Mama, my kids are not ever forced to do anything, but when it comes to this, we have to do something. Evan is 16, he needs to understand that the choices he makes now will impact him for the rest of his life.
But...how do you do that? How do you convince someone that is of the age where they know everything?
So, I roared, and I will keep roaring until he gets it. I have no choice in the matter. I want so much for him, and I know that he also wants a lot for himself, so if I have to be the mean mama right now, so be it!
I do unschool/homeschool for a reason, but we feel that this is the best option for him at this point. He would like to become an attorney, that is a lot of work, and this is the work he needs to do now, so that way he can become what he wants.
So the roar will go on, and the battle has just began...and I hate having battles with my kids!
At first he was doing well, doing his work, and then it was like a wall came up, and it all just stopped. Evan stopped logging on, and stopped completing assignments. Emails, and call ensured, and then came the threats that they would remove him from the program.
This is not a happy Mommy. I am not a tough Mama, my kids are not ever forced to do anything, but when it comes to this, we have to do something. Evan is 16, he needs to understand that the choices he makes now will impact him for the rest of his life.
But...how do you do that? How do you convince someone that is of the age where they know everything?
So, I roared, and I will keep roaring until he gets it. I have no choice in the matter. I want so much for him, and I know that he also wants a lot for himself, so if I have to be the mean mama right now, so be it!
I do unschool/homeschool for a reason, but we feel that this is the best option for him at this point. He would like to become an attorney, that is a lot of work, and this is the work he needs to do now, so that way he can become what he wants.
So the roar will go on, and the battle has just began...and I hate having battles with my kids!
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
Garden endings....
Today I went out and started gathering much of what was left to gather from the garden. A few more pumpkin's, a huge amount of tomatoes, some really tiny carrots, and lettuce. We had a nice salad with our lasagna tonight!
Chloe helped her Aunt make the lasagna...we had a friend over for dinner, and had a great dinner with amazing company!
The girls are doing well on the reading program that I started with them, it may get boring for them after awhile, nut they will learn more, and retain more of the information. We read the same story everyday, with certain "power" words that we use in so many ways. I think that it is helping them.
Chloe helped her Aunt make the lasagna...we had a friend over for dinner, and had a great dinner with amazing company!
The girls are doing well on the reading program that I started with them, it may get boring for them after awhile, nut they will learn more, and retain more of the information. We read the same story everyday, with certain "power" words that we use in so many ways. I think that it is helping them.
Tuesday, October 11, 2011
Today I made a pillow
I spent a large portion of the day making a pillow, it just took longer than I thought it would!
But when I finally finshed, with mutiple wounds to my fingers, almost throwing my machine through the window, I received the best thing of all, a very happy little girl!
It was worth every little thing!
But when I finally finshed, with mutiple wounds to my fingers, almost throwing my machine through the window, I received the best thing of all, a very happy little girl!
It was worth every little thing!
Wednesday, October 5, 2011
Simply ten good things!
Inspired by Amanda Soule, this is my list of simply ten good things!
Window sills full of riping tomatoes from the garden.
An unexpected kiss.
A wonderful magical creation out of salt dough.
The warmth of a hug.
Laying on bed with your daughters, just giggling about nothing.
The sound of rain, when you have nowhere to go.
Fresh eggs.
Fresh raw milk.
The smell of clean laundry, off the line.
The woodsy smell of my daughter.
Now it is your turn!
Window sills full of riping tomatoes from the garden.
An unexpected kiss.
A wonderful magical creation out of salt dough.
The warmth of a hug.
Laying on bed with your daughters, just giggling about nothing.
The sound of rain, when you have nowhere to go.
Fresh eggs.
Fresh raw milk.
The smell of clean laundry, off the line.
The woodsy smell of my daughter.
Now it is your turn!
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Glob...
Glob, a word that you do not see everyday, but which is something that you must look into. Recently ecomom.com has a special, you buy a 20 in gift cards you get 40 to spend. So I did this, one thing I got was glob, it is a dry pigment paint set. It comes with the dry pigments, brushes(bamboo) mxing cups with lids and instructions. The colors are all made out of fruits, veggies, and herbs. Blueberry, plums, basil, to name just a few. The colors are wonderful, and are amazing. You control how to mix itm so if you want thicker you would simple use less water, if you want it more like water colors you use more water.
Glob is a wonderful product! We truely love it!
Glob is a wonderful product! We truely love it!
Wednesday, September 14, 2011
Our family poem: Closing the Circle
Our family poem
Closing The Circle
by Wendell Berry
Within the circle of our lives
we dance the circle of the years,
the circles of the seasons
within the circles of the years,
the cycles of the moon
within the circles of the season,
the circles of our reasons
within the cycles of the moon.
Again, again we come and go,
changed, changing. Hands
join, unjoin in love and fear,
grief and joy. The circles turn,
each giving into each, into all.
Only music keeps us here,
each by all the others held.
In the hold of hands and eyes
we turn in pairs, that joining
joining each to all again.
And then we turn aside, alone,
out of the sunlight gone
into the darker circles of return.
Closing The Circle
by Wendell Berry
Within the circle of our lives
we dance the circle of the years,
the circles of the seasons
within the circles of the years,
the cycles of the moon
within the circles of the season,
the circles of our reasons
within the cycles of the moon.
Again, again we come and go,
changed, changing. Hands
join, unjoin in love and fear,
grief and joy. The circles turn,
each giving into each, into all.
Only music keeps us here,
each by all the others held.
In the hold of hands and eyes
we turn in pairs, that joining
joining each to all again.
And then we turn aside, alone,
out of the sunlight gone
into the darker circles of return.
Wednesday, August 17, 2011
Tuesday, August 16, 2011
Gardening, hens, and sick children!
The garden is going leaps and bounds! I am hoping to be able to harvest many wonderful things soon!
The hens are also growing in leaps and bounds....hopfully eggs will start coming soon! Excited by having our own eggs again!
Chloe is sick, we are now in limbo, waiting to see who else will fall to this sickness that is taking over!
The hens are also growing in leaps and bounds....hopfully eggs will start coming soon! Excited by having our own eggs again!
Chloe is sick, we are now in limbo, waiting to see who else will fall to this sickness that is taking over!
Wednesday, August 10, 2011
Coming to the end of summer
Summer will be over soon, even when we did not have much on one here in the PNW, but still I love it here.
One of my many reasons for moving back here is because the weather is much nicer, no extreme heat.
Our garden is growing rapidly...still not a lot to harvest yet. The chickens are in their coop, we have painted the kitchen and the bathroom. Next is to get the girls room decorated how they would like them.
We will be starting our official year of homeschool...yes another year of this! It will be out 9th year! WOW! I still worry that they are learning what they need, but then I watch them, and see what they do everyday on their own, and I know that they are exactly were they need to be at this moment.
I still worry about the reading issue for the girls, but I also know that it will come.
I watch them, my three beautiful, sweet children, and I just know that we are doing everything right. Each are bright, beautiful, happy, and are complete human beings.
Everyday I look at my children, and I know that we are also exactly where we need to be.
One of my many reasons for moving back here is because the weather is much nicer, no extreme heat.
Our garden is growing rapidly...still not a lot to harvest yet. The chickens are in their coop, we have painted the kitchen and the bathroom. Next is to get the girls room decorated how they would like them.
We will be starting our official year of homeschool...yes another year of this! It will be out 9th year! WOW! I still worry that they are learning what they need, but then I watch them, and see what they do everyday on their own, and I know that they are exactly were they need to be at this moment.
I still worry about the reading issue for the girls, but I also know that it will come.
I watch them, my three beautiful, sweet children, and I just know that we are doing everything right. Each are bright, beautiful, happy, and are complete human beings.
Everyday I look at my children, and I know that we are also exactly where we need to be.
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
Life on my little urban farm is never really boring.
Thw chickens are now over a month old, and will soon be moved to the outside coop...they will happy!
All 16 chicks have survived, which surprised me, since they were mailed from Texas, Ideal poultry is amazing, I highly recommend them.
The lasagna garden is growing amazingly well. The creole tomatoes are doing so well, which I was really worried about this since the soil here is so different here.
The kids are still doing school type work, but right now they are more 'free ranging' it all right now. Which is good for them since they are being very creative this way.
Thw chickens are now over a month old, and will soon be moved to the outside coop...they will happy!
All 16 chicks have survived, which surprised me, since they were mailed from Texas, Ideal poultry is amazing, I highly recommend them.
The lasagna garden is growing amazingly well. The creole tomatoes are doing so well, which I was really worried about this since the soil here is so different here.
The kids are still doing school type work, but right now they are more 'free ranging' it all right now. Which is good for them since they are being very creative this way.
Thursday, June 9, 2011
Chicks and the garden!
Today the baby chicks arrived in the mail! We have a total of 16, and all seem to be doing well at this moment.
We decided on many different kinds, that way we can see what type we like the best.
I have never thought about buying chicks from a mail order place, but this time we decided to try it, so far Ideal Poultry has done a great job!
The chicks were hatched on June 7th at 10:00 AM I love knowing that! In 7 or 8 months we should have eggs!
The garden is coming along nicely, I am excited about the thought of all that home grown veggies!
Tomatoes coming in!
Arugula! This my make shift green house frame!
Creole Tomatoes! In Washington!
My beloved lavender, one of my most favorite things ever!
Over all I feel that it is all coming along nicely. I am going to be heading to Farmer's markets a lot, I will be canning in August. I am hoping to make many items that we use a lot of during the year, and that way they will be put up for the year.
We decided on many different kinds, that way we can see what type we like the best.
I have never thought about buying chicks from a mail order place, but this time we decided to try it, so far Ideal Poultry has done a great job!
The chicks were hatched on June 7th at 10:00 AM I love knowing that! In 7 or 8 months we should have eggs!
The garden is coming along nicely, I am excited about the thought of all that home grown veggies!
Tomatoes coming in!
Arugula! This my make shift green house frame!
Creole Tomatoes! In Washington!
My beloved lavender, one of my most favorite things ever!
Over all I feel that it is all coming along nicely. I am going to be heading to Farmer's markets a lot, I will be canning in August. I am hoping to make many items that we use a lot of during the year, and that way they will be put up for the year.
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
Homeschooling-unschooling
The summer is upon us, and we had to sit down and think about what we wanted to do for the summer.
Do we just keep going, or do we have a vacation? We have decided to do both!
Since we moved in March, our homeschooling/unschooling was not very active. We still have a lot of catch up to do, and well we have been rather slow about it.
With having a daughter severely dyslexic, and another one that feels she should not have to do more work than her older sister, it has been a challenge for us. Evan is on his own thing, he really is closer to a traditional unschooler, as he goes with what he want to learn at that moment. Of course I have to throw in things, but still he is doing really good, and is bring up historical people, that I have never even heard of!
I am worried about the girls, they are not up to the reading levels that they should be, and this is really scary. I want so much for them, and I am afraid that they may not be getting all that they deserve at home!
I know that they want to remain at home, that has become very clear, when I had to promise them that I would not send them to that "horrible" place!
Lamar County (TX) School's really damage my kids! I am still amazed at how fast a school district can ruin education for a child, for our it was less than 1 year! I know it is not fair to blame the who school distric, but the kids ended up with some really horrible teachers, and only a couple of really good ones.
I know that we will get a handle on this, but it still scares me that they will not have the love of books that Aidan and I do. Evan does, but the girls not so much. I am hoping that this will change soon!
Do we just keep going, or do we have a vacation? We have decided to do both!
Since we moved in March, our homeschooling/unschooling was not very active. We still have a lot of catch up to do, and well we have been rather slow about it.
With having a daughter severely dyslexic, and another one that feels she should not have to do more work than her older sister, it has been a challenge for us. Evan is on his own thing, he really is closer to a traditional unschooler, as he goes with what he want to learn at that moment. Of course I have to throw in things, but still he is doing really good, and is bring up historical people, that I have never even heard of!
I am worried about the girls, they are not up to the reading levels that they should be, and this is really scary. I want so much for them, and I am afraid that they may not be getting all that they deserve at home!
I know that they want to remain at home, that has become very clear, when I had to promise them that I would not send them to that "horrible" place!
Lamar County (TX) School's really damage my kids! I am still amazed at how fast a school district can ruin education for a child, for our it was less than 1 year! I know it is not fair to blame the who school distric, but the kids ended up with some really horrible teachers, and only a couple of really good ones.
I know that we will get a handle on this, but it still scares me that they will not have the love of books that Aidan and I do. Evan does, but the girls not so much. I am hoping that this will change soon!
Sunday, May 29, 2011
Lasagna Garden, grren house and chickens! OH MY!
Today was a day of working on getting the garden ready. Late I know, but here in the Pacific NW the spring has been very late this year.
I am making a "Lasagna garden" I have seen in mutiple place over the past few years the first was on "B. Orginal" with Michele Beschen, I loved the idea then. Then in MaryJane's Farm there was an article about it...I had to do!
This was what was done today. We layed cardboard boxes on the group(from our move! Reuse!) Then there was a huge pile of compost that was left here, so we then spread that over the boxes. This will wet down between layers, and on Friday we will place our Tagro dirt! I will let add another layer of cardboard, compost and then dirt.
I also cleared out the green house, now I need to get some PVC clear plastic to fix the broken glass.
I just ordered our chicks from Ideal Poultry. I ordered:
Rhode Island Red 3
Ameraucana 3
Barred Plymouth Rock 3
Silver Spangled Hamburg 2
Silver Laced Wyandotte 3
Standard Sultan 2
That is a real good start!
I have more to do tomorrow...I am also thinking about other things that I can do to make our lives more substainable.
I am making a "Lasagna garden" I have seen in mutiple place over the past few years the first was on "B. Orginal" with Michele Beschen, I loved the idea then. Then in MaryJane's Farm there was an article about it...I had to do!
This was what was done today. We layed cardboard boxes on the group(from our move! Reuse!) Then there was a huge pile of compost that was left here, so we then spread that over the boxes. This will wet down between layers, and on Friday we will place our Tagro dirt! I will let add another layer of cardboard, compost and then dirt.
I also cleared out the green house, now I need to get some PVC clear plastic to fix the broken glass.
I just ordered our chicks from Ideal Poultry. I ordered:
Rhode Island Red 3
Ameraucana 3
Barred Plymouth Rock 3
Silver Spangled Hamburg 2
Silver Laced Wyandotte 3
Standard Sultan 2
That is a real good start!
I have more to do tomorrow...I am also thinking about other things that I can do to make our lives more substainable.
Thursday, May 19, 2011
Upcoming Self-Reliance Food and Broom Classes May 2011 in Seattle, WA
Self-Reliance Food and Broom Classes May 2011 in Seattle, WA
with Linda Conroy and John Holzwart of Moonwise Herbs (Wisconsin)
Linda Conroy is an herbalist and whole food enthusiast. John Holzwart is a wild forager and broom maker. To Learn more, visit: www.moonwiseherbs.com/seattlehappenings.htm or check out Moonwise Herbs on Facebook! or email mailto:rosemarygoddess%40moonwiseherbs.com with questions!
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May 21, 2011
Home Cheese Making Beyond the Basics: From Curd to Press with Linda Feta, Cheddar, and Gouda (10am-4pm) with Linda Conroy
Discover the art of making these classic aged favorites at home. Review cheese making basics and explore approaches in pressing and curing cheese. Leave with recipes and confidence to begin the journey of cheese making at home. Lunch will include a salad served with several types of home-made cheese for inspiration.
North Seattle Community College for registration, visit www.learnatnorth.org or call 206-527-3705
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May 25, 2011
Introduction to Cheese Making (6-9pm)
Making cheese in your own kitchen is fun and easy. Discover how to create soft, spreadable cream cheese, mozzarella and paneer. Learn about fermented milk products like yogurt, kefir and piima and how to transform them into delicious fresh cheeses. Go home with simple instructions, recipes, a culture to get you started and delicious cheese samples.with simple instructions, recipes, a culture to get you started and delicious cheese samples.
North Seattle Community College for registration, visit www.learnatnorth.org or call 206-527-3705
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May 21, 2011
Broom Making: A Functional Art (6-9pm) with Little John
Discover the art of making handmade brooms! You will be guided through this beautiful and functional art. Students will learn to make one round or one flat hearth broom (your choice), weaving and sowing the broom corn into place by hand.
North Seattle Community College for registration, visit www.learnatnorth.org or call 206-527-3705
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May 23, 2011
Beer, Wine and Soda Making! (6-9pm) with Little John
Learn how easy it is to make beer, wine, mead, and soda in your own kitchen. Learning the basics participants will leave feeling confident in making their own beverages at home. Discussions about influencing your beverages with herbs for promoting health will be included. Each person will leave with a bottle that we cork together as well as a soda culture to get you started.
North Seattle Community College for registration, visit www.learnatnorth.org or call 206-527-3705
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May 24, 2011
Mini-Quidditch Broom Making (AGES 7-11) (5:30-7:30pm) with Little John
Calling all Harry Potter fans! Create your very own 24 inch mini-quidditch broom. Tie, wind and cut to create your broom made of broomcorn, string and wood. All materials provided. Wear long sleeves as the broomcorn can be itchy!
Anderson Center, Edmonds, WA for registration, visit www.reczone.org or call 425-771-0230
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May 24, 2011
Herbal-Milk Based Soap Making (6-9pm) with Linda Conroy
This class is for the experienced as well as the beginning soap maker. We will explore the art of creating luxurious soap that incorporates fresh goat milk (cow as well as whey will also be discussed). Milk based soap makes the creamiest soap around. It is considered a delicacy in the soap market. This class will offer essential tips to creating your own. We will also learn about a variety of whole herbs that can be included to create unique batches of soap. Participants will take home recipes as well as some of the soap we create in class. Bring rubber gloves, 4 small yogurt containers with a lid and an old towel. All other supplies provided. Material fee $7
North Seattle Community College for registration, visit www.learnatnorth.org or call 206-527-3705
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May 26, 2011
Pine Needle Basketry Class (6-9pm) with Linda Conroy
Make your own gifts! Learn to coil and stitch to craft a miniature pine needle basket. Discover basket styles, decorative options and how these techniques can be applied to other mediums. $10 materials fee includes supplies to make a second basket at home. Bring thimble, small scissors and reading glasses if needed.
Anderson Center, Edmonds, WA for registration, visit www.reczone.org or call 425-771-0230
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June 1-5, 2011
9th Annual Herbal and Seaweed Harvesting with Linda Conroy
Travel to Lopez Island and learn to wild harvest herbs and seaweed.
For more information and registration, visit www.moonwiseherbs.com
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Olympia Dukakis' Spiritual Journey
Olympia Dukakis' Spiritual JourneyThe Oscar-winning actress talks about her exploration of women's spirituality and meeting her Indian guru.BY: Margaret Wolff Excerpted with permission from "In Sweet Company" We know her best as Rose Castorini, the intrepid wife from "Moonstruck," the devoted friend Clarey from "Steel Magnolias," and the clear-sighted Mrs. Madrigal from "Tales of the City." Olympia Dukakis has endeared herself to audiences around the world for her dynamic portrayals of the grand transformations and subtle accommodations that are the bread and butter of women's lives. The daughter of Greek immigrants, Olympia grew up in Lowell, Massachusetts in a neighborhood where ethnic discrimination, particularly against Greeks, was routine. Early in her career, she was advised to change her name to something "less ethnic." She refused, despite the fact that it would have paved the way to a greater variety of roles.
Olympia supported herself as a physical therapist during the height of the polio epidemic. She saved her money, returned to school and earned a Masters in Fine Arts at Boston University's School of the Performing Arts. Degree in hand, she moved to New York City to pursue a stage career. Shortly thereafter, she appeared in a production of "Medea" where she met and fell in love with actor Louis Zorich. Their forty-year marriage produced three children and a lifelong repository of unconditional support.
In 1988, after thirty years of performing and teaching, Olympia won the Academy Award for Best Supporting Actress, for her portrayal of the Italian matriarch in "Moonstruck." Later that year, she stood on the podium alongside first-cousin Michael Dukakis, then Governor of Massachusetts, as he accepted the Democratic nomination for President of the United States. It was, for her, a profound moment, a proud declaration of her ethnicity that she claimed for her entire family.
One of her most personally memorable roles was in the play "The Trojan Women." It opened her heart to what has become a profound relationship with the Great Mother, the feminine aspect of God long venerated in the ancient cultures of the Indus River Valley. In 1985, she met Srimata Gayatri Devi, an Indian spiritual teacher in the Vedanta tradition, and studied with her until her passing.
In 1992, she and several friends co-created "Voices of Earth," a non-profit theater company designed to help women, including herself, explore their spiritual heritage and birth their own spiritual transformation. Olympia describes the performances that have emerged as "emotional, physical, spiritual and joyful" pieces that explore through metaphor issues unique to women's lives.
The following are excerpts from the interview. Olympia is apprehensive, she tells me, "talking about women's spirituality in a world that has suppressed its existence for thousands of years."
Is it because it's hard to put something so subtle into words? "No. I think it's because most of us talk one way and live another. There are a few people who truly, truly walk the talk - who are, as Merlin Stone wrote, `women who have gone over the mountain.' The rest of us just talk the talk. The rest of us are still trying to find ways to live in the world with spiritual values. Myself included. We've learned certain skills, we've learned to prevail somewhat, but we've not made it over the mountain. I sometimes truly despair at ever being meaningfully altered and affected by the things I claim are so important to me. .
"Most of us are not real eager to grow, myself included. We try to be happy by staying in the status quo. But if we're not willing to be honest with ourselves about what we feel, we don't evolve."
I tell her that I think this struggle to bring our inner and outer worlds together is an ongoing part of the spiritual life, that when we face these contradictions, we can then choose how we will `walk our talk.' "I understand this now," she confides. "In 1985, I became very involved with Gayatri Devi, a spiritual teacher, who helped me see this."
How did you meet her? "It was at Omega Institute. My husband, daughter and I were in therapy because of issues that came up after he had a terrible automobile accident. The therapist said everyone was OK except me, that I was behaving as if we were still in crisis. He said I had to do something to focus on myself, by myself, or he wouldn't see me anymore. I rooted around for something to do and a friend suggested I go to Omega. I had my doubts - it seemed to me like a camp for precocious adults! - but I went anyway.
"The only weekend I was free was during what they call their `Spiritual Weekend,' so I signed up for that. Friday night, the presenters sat on a stage and talked about their upcoming workshops. There were rabbis and Cambodian monks and Indian swamis and Protestants and Catholics and Native Americans. It was a whole smorgasbord! And there was this little lady in saffron robes. I was very moved by what she said, but of course, I didn't permit that to influence me! I decided to go with a shaman because I'd been reading a lot about shamans at the time.
"The workshop I went to was like a bad acting class! Everyone was trying to get in touch with their feelings - beating drums and howling - but I stayed with it. The next day, the leader asked us each to share why we'd come to Omega. Everyone gave such esoteric and spiritual reasons - and there I was because my therapist told me that if I didn't do something about myself, he wouldn't see me anymore! But when my time came to talk, I got very choked up and said, `I'm here to open my heart.' I don't know where that came from, but that's what I said.
"The workshop continued with much sage-burning and carrying on, but I just couldn't do it anymore. I walked outside toward a little house where I heard the chanting of women's voices. "I looked in the window and saw the woman I'd been so moved by the night before sitting in lotus position on a slightly raised platform. I walked in and sat down. Gayatri Devi was a bhakti, as they say in India; hers was the path of devotion to God. She was talking in an animated way about the Great Mother, about Her role in the Vedanta tradition. The more she talked, the more I cried. I didn't know why I was crying. It wasn't that I was sad; I was just crying...
"After the break, I went over and asked Sudha - Ma's assistant at that time, and the one to whom the mantle was passed after Ma's death - if I could speak with Ma, with Gayatri Devi. She told me it would be impossible to see her, that Ma was totally booked. I wasn't too upset because I already knew something about what Ma had been talking about. The truth was, I had secretly gotten involved with the Great Mother on my own, thinking I was the only person on the planet to do so. I had no idea other people were interested in Her.
"I started to walk outside when Sudha came over to me and said Ma wanted to see me. I froze and said, `It's OK,' but Sudha said, `No, Ma wants to see you.' So I started up the hill to where Ma was sitting - to a table and two chairs facing each other under some trees - and as I walked, my awareness of all external sound left me. It was as if I were walking in a vacuum. I sat down and told her my name and what brought me to Omega. Finally, I told her about the two times I heard the Voice .
"She became very alert, then asked me some questions about the Voice. Then she said, `What are you afraid of?'"
Tears begin to run down Olympia's cheeks. "I said, `I'm afraid of this love, afraid I would be lost.' And Ma said, `Lost in the sea of Her love?' I said, `Yes. I'm afraid if I allow myself to feel it, I won't come back. I know what that is. I've psychologically let go before and struggled to come back.'
"Ma looked at me for a long time, almost as if she were x-raying me. Then she talked to me and her words made me feel I would be all right, that I could receive the Great Mother's love - which is still hard for me to do - and give Her love - which is easier. You know?"
Before I can answer her, Olympia digs into her jacket pocket and pulls out a small book of prayers written by Swami Paramananda, an Indian monk of the Ramakrishna Order. "I want to read something to you," she says. She reads me some prayers, not as an actress but as a bhakti, filled with the devotion that inspired words she has since made her own.
Great Mother Heart, how tender art Thou I ask her how she would define spirituality. "Well, there's something open-hearted about it. I really understood how important this was when my mother was dying from Alzheimer's. Her defenses went away and she was no longer suspicious or critical. Her heart opened.
"So why does this seem part and parcel of spirituality? I guess because in order to be open-hearted, you have to trust, or be willing to trust - but trust with open eyes. You have to look at the reality of things. Sometimes there's darkness and pain. That's part of life, too."
Being open-hearted in the face of contradictions? "Being open-hearted when the world pretty much looks like a place your heart should be defended and protected against." |
__._,_.___
Wednesday, May 11, 2011
Mother's Day, House warming party, and raw milk!
The past few weeks have been busy, thus why I have not been updating as I should.
We went roller skating, and I found out that the kids do not trust skates, nope not at all!
Then we went to the point defiance zoo which was fun, since we have not been there in a very long time.
I finally got the bathroom done, and I made the shower curtains and the window curtain. I will post pictures soon! I also hung a print by artist Nikki McClure, whom I love! I got the print "Invest" which I love so very much!
We had the house warming party, which was so much fun, we got to see so many people, many who we have not seen in a very long time. I also our friends that also moved from New Orleans.
Mother's Day was the next day, and that was great. The girls picked me flowers from the garden, they drew me wonderful pictures, and they helped make one of my most favorite dinners; Coconut chicken, aloo Gobi, and naan. It was wonderful!
The hard part was the fact that I could not be with my Mom, that is always hard for me.
I finally went out and found some Raw cows milk, and it is amazing! I found it at Marlene's Market, and it comes from Cozy Valley Farms and all I can say is that it is the most amazing thing I have ever drank! I know where my milk came from Tenino, WA, from a jersey cow named "Saucey" I even have her picture, and you know what that makes it even better! I have a direct link to where the milk comes from. This is so important to me.
I am amazed that Raw milk isn't sold everywhere, but maybe that is the secret...it is not done like the mass feed me mentalities of the mass producers of milk. I know that there is no growth hormones, and I know that the milk is healthy!
The funny thing is the fact that I really did not like milk before, now I love it! Go firgure!
The benefits of raw milk are amazing, I will not go on about that here, as there is so many more websites that can expain it much better than me, one I know of that I really liked is Raw Milk Facts. All I can say is that I now know why it is known as "White gold" it really just that!
We went roller skating, and I found out that the kids do not trust skates, nope not at all!
Then we went to the point defiance zoo which was fun, since we have not been there in a very long time.
I finally got the bathroom done, and I made the shower curtains and the window curtain. I will post pictures soon! I also hung a print by artist Nikki McClure, whom I love! I got the print "Invest" which I love so very much!
We had the house warming party, which was so much fun, we got to see so many people, many who we have not seen in a very long time. I also our friends that also moved from New Orleans.
Mother's Day was the next day, and that was great. The girls picked me flowers from the garden, they drew me wonderful pictures, and they helped make one of my most favorite dinners; Coconut chicken, aloo Gobi, and naan. It was wonderful!
The hard part was the fact that I could not be with my Mom, that is always hard for me.
I finally went out and found some Raw cows milk, and it is amazing! I found it at Marlene's Market, and it comes from Cozy Valley Farms and all I can say is that it is the most amazing thing I have ever drank! I know where my milk came from Tenino, WA, from a jersey cow named "Saucey" I even have her picture, and you know what that makes it even better! I have a direct link to where the milk comes from. This is so important to me.
I am amazed that Raw milk isn't sold everywhere, but maybe that is the secret...it is not done like the mass feed me mentalities of the mass producers of milk. I know that there is no growth hormones, and I know that the milk is healthy!
The funny thing is the fact that I really did not like milk before, now I love it! Go firgure!
The benefits of raw milk are amazing, I will not go on about that here, as there is so many more websites that can expain it much better than me, one I know of that I really liked is Raw Milk Facts. All I can say is that I now know why it is known as "White gold" it really just that!
Saturday, April 23, 2011
Looking for Homeschool groups
We have been in Tacoma for close to two months, and still have not met one homeschool family in person! Much is my fault, as many of the activities planned cost money, which is very tight right now.
We are hoping to find a "park day" group, one that meets close to us, and just gathers at parks, and other free areas.
I know that with Summer coming(I will believe that when I see it) that things slow down, but I am hoping that there are other parents out there also want to still get together.
This is not easy thing for us, and the fact that thye have yet to make new frineds is hard on them.
We will be going to the homeschool convention in June. I am hoping that I can find more resources that way as well.
We are hoping to find a "park day" group, one that meets close to us, and just gathers at parks, and other free areas.
I know that with Summer coming(I will believe that when I see it) that things slow down, but I am hoping that there are other parents out there also want to still get together.
This is not easy thing for us, and the fact that thye have yet to make new frineds is hard on them.
We will be going to the homeschool convention in June. I am hoping that I can find more resources that way as well.
Wednesday, April 13, 2011
Our Life now
we have been back in Tacoma now for a little over a month. We are still in our adjustment stage, we are unpacking, getting use to the weather.
The weather! I think I had forgotten some of what it was like, and it will take time to readjust to what it is like here, compared to New Orleans, Tacoma is so very different. I love the cooler weather, I hated how hot it could be in New Orleans, but I also miss the spring of New Orleans.
Yes we are also having issue's with food! It is not easy to get true Andouille sausage here, Blue runner is not sold here, neither is Camellia beans. Abita beer is not here, nor is gator balls or gator jerky! They do not sell Gundry's here, and bell peppers are very expensive!
I can not go down to Chickie Wah wah and see Grayson Capps...
Like I said it will take getting use too!
What we do have here, People who are our family, a safe neighborhood to raise our children, a wonderful house to live, a huge yard for the kids to play in, and a calmness that I missed!
I know that my children miss their friends in New Orleans, I also miss mine. I miss New Orleans in so many ways, but to be honest, I love Tacoma more. This home.
The move was bittersweet, I cried when the plane took off from the airport in New Orleans, but then I cried when the plane landed in Seattle. New Orleans will always have a piece of my heart, not even Los Angeles can say that.
We will need more time to get use to being here, I know this, but it has also been easier than I thought it would be, I know my way around, I know where to shop for the best deals, and I know of places that we loved to explore, as I said it is home.
The weather! I think I had forgotten some of what it was like, and it will take time to readjust to what it is like here, compared to New Orleans, Tacoma is so very different. I love the cooler weather, I hated how hot it could be in New Orleans, but I also miss the spring of New Orleans.
Yes we are also having issue's with food! It is not easy to get true Andouille sausage here, Blue runner is not sold here, neither is Camellia beans. Abita beer is not here, nor is gator balls or gator jerky! They do not sell Gundry's here, and bell peppers are very expensive!
I can not go down to Chickie Wah wah and see Grayson Capps...
Like I said it will take getting use too!
What we do have here, People who are our family, a safe neighborhood to raise our children, a wonderful house to live, a huge yard for the kids to play in, and a calmness that I missed!
I know that my children miss their friends in New Orleans, I also miss mine. I miss New Orleans in so many ways, but to be honest, I love Tacoma more. This home.
The move was bittersweet, I cried when the plane took off from the airport in New Orleans, but then I cried when the plane landed in Seattle. New Orleans will always have a piece of my heart, not even Los Angeles can say that.
We will need more time to get use to being here, I know this, but it has also been easier than I thought it would be, I know my way around, I know where to shop for the best deals, and I know of places that we loved to explore, as I said it is home.
Wednesday, March 23, 2011
Tacoma
We landed in Tacoma three weeks ago, and I now know for a fact that nothing worth having is ever easy!
Flying out of New orleans on Mardi gras day was a total experience in learning about people! We viewed people coming to board still in their costums from the days events. The cat and the hat, a penis, and many lady gaga's. It was an event!
Tacoma is like I left it almost 5 years ago, some things have changed but over all it is the same place.
I am missing many people in New orleans, I knew this would happen, but i know that I will see them again, and I know that i will visit NOLA again, it has a piece of me, and me of it within me always.
Flying out of New orleans on Mardi gras day was a total experience in learning about people! We viewed people coming to board still in their costums from the days events. The cat and the hat, a penis, and many lady gaga's. It was an event!
Tacoma is like I left it almost 5 years ago, some things have changed but over all it is the same place.
I am missing many people in New orleans, I knew this would happen, but i know that I will see them again, and I know that i will visit NOLA again, it has a piece of me, and me of it within me always.
Friday, February 25, 2011
Moving on
In one week will be loading our truck for our move back to Tacoma. In someways I am very excited, there are so many people that I can not wait to see, hug and hold. I will also have to let go of some people that I have truly come to love here in New Orleans.
Through our now defunct unschoolers group we met many people who have become very important in our lives while living in New Orleans, some of them have already moved to other area'.
Saying goodbye in never anything I enjoy doing, I am always afraid that I will never see those people again...and in this case I truly hope that I will see many of them again.
The kids are also having many mixed emotions, they are excited, but they are also very sad about leaving their friends that they each have come so close too.
But we each know that we are doing this to make our lives better, and to return where we were meant to be.
It has been almost 5 years since we loaded a truck and moved to Paris, Texas. We existed in that town for less that 2 years, yes we meet some people that we cared for, but living in small rural Texas town was not for us, and I learned a lot living there...like I now understand family better.
I found out that to be "family" you do not have to have the same blood running in your veins, that we can also pick our family. That family is more about love, respect,trust, and truth.
When my parents both passed so fast, my Mom in December and then my Father in February, I lost it, I stop thinking in a healthy way, I became panicked and started making choices that were not for the best.
I know that I had to do these past five years, that I had to figure out my life, and what was best for my family.
Getting back to Tacoma means a lot for my family, it is were our family is, and it were I can have the life we need/want.
The house we rented is in a safe area, we can have a garden, and grow a lot of what we eat, to be a healthier family.
Through our now defunct unschoolers group we met many people who have become very important in our lives while living in New Orleans, some of them have already moved to other area'.
Saying goodbye in never anything I enjoy doing, I am always afraid that I will never see those people again...and in this case I truly hope that I will see many of them again.
The kids are also having many mixed emotions, they are excited, but they are also very sad about leaving their friends that they each have come so close too.
But we each know that we are doing this to make our lives better, and to return where we were meant to be.
It has been almost 5 years since we loaded a truck and moved to Paris, Texas. We existed in that town for less that 2 years, yes we meet some people that we cared for, but living in small rural Texas town was not for us, and I learned a lot living there...like I now understand family better.
I found out that to be "family" you do not have to have the same blood running in your veins, that we can also pick our family. That family is more about love, respect,trust, and truth.
When my parents both passed so fast, my Mom in December and then my Father in February, I lost it, I stop thinking in a healthy way, I became panicked and started making choices that were not for the best.
I know that I had to do these past five years, that I had to figure out my life, and what was best for my family.
Getting back to Tacoma means a lot for my family, it is were our family is, and it were I can have the life we need/want.
The house we rented is in a safe area, we can have a garden, and grow a lot of what we eat, to be a healthier family.
Saturday, February 12, 2011
New Orleans and the end coming soon
In about 20 days we will be leaving New orleans for Tacoma, I am excited about returning home, but I am also having many issues with the fact that I am leaving this amazing city.
I know that I am gonna miss so much about this amazing city, and not the stuff most people think. Sure the quarter is cool, sure there is a lot of history, but New orleans is so much moere than that. It is the people, the smells, and the taste of New orleans. It is like no where else in this world. A piece of my heart will always be here. I now know and understand this.
Moving from NOLA was not an easy decision for us to make, we do not hate it here, in fact we love it, we have friends here, A there is work, but we also are living in a city that is on the brink of something that is dark, and very terrifing. Where we live there have been an aveage of one murder a week since we lived here! Yes we could move, but the violence in NOLA is very high, and it is scary.
We deciced on Tacoma because we have people there that will be there for all that can happen in life, our children can play outside, and it just more closely the life we want.
Yes NOLA will be in our hearts forever, and she is a city that will always hold her magic for us!
Saturday, February 5, 2011
STRESSSSSSSSSSSSS!!!!!
let's see the past few days have been more stressful than normal. We are trying find and rent a house in Tacoma, WA from New Orleans, LA! This is not an easy feat, let me tell you, we have people that have homes for rent but do not want to deal out of state, then we have people who are TOTAL FREAKING flakes, since they will only email/call you back after you really bug them...then they tell you are welcome to place an application(paying a $51.00 fee) but there is a pending application!
I just want a house, nothing fancy even! I want a place to put our belongings, and a place for my children to sleep when we get there!
Then I buy our airplane tickets on Travelocity.com, we pick Delta, buy our tickets and then find out that to check a bag we must pay $23.00! Then a purse counts as a carry on! WHAT! I will never use either company again!
So this will be a fun 6 and half hour flight with 3 kids and very limited amount of things they can do!
I am so stressed about all of it really...finding a place to live, the trip there, and then there is the amount of money going out for all of this!
So that is where we are at right now! I am stressed! LOL
I just want a house, nothing fancy even! I want a place to put our belongings, and a place for my children to sleep when we get there!
Then I buy our airplane tickets on Travelocity.com, we pick Delta, buy our tickets and then find out that to check a bag we must pay $23.00! Then a purse counts as a carry on! WHAT! I will never use either company again!
So this will be a fun 6 and half hour flight with 3 kids and very limited amount of things they can do!
I am so stressed about all of it really...finding a place to live, the trip there, and then there is the amount of money going out for all of this!
So that is where we are at right now! I am stressed! LOL
Wednesday, February 2, 2011
Get ready, get set, GO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Let's see in the past few days we have been busy.
We have bought our tickets to Tacoma, airline instead of train, since the prices were big difference now.
We will be leaving New Orleans on Mardi gras day! I think that is a sign or something. we will be here for all the important parade's so that is wonderful!
But to be honest there is so much I would rather be doing in New Orleans...that really is not the magic of this city.
We are not moving because we hate it here, there is so much that is wonderful and amazing here in NOLA. The city is like none other, the people truely love their city, they love the culture, and they love and support their city.
I just need to have more support for my family...I have a dream of a life I want and I do not see that happening here.
There will be so many people that I will miss, that Aidan will miss and the kids have many people they will miss.
We have bought our tickets to Tacoma, airline instead of train, since the prices were big difference now.
We will be leaving New Orleans on Mardi gras day! I think that is a sign or something. we will be here for all the important parade's so that is wonderful!
But to be honest there is so much I would rather be doing in New Orleans...that really is not the magic of this city.
We are not moving because we hate it here, there is so much that is wonderful and amazing here in NOLA. The city is like none other, the people truely love their city, they love the culture, and they love and support their city.
I just need to have more support for my family...I have a dream of a life I want and I do not see that happening here.
There will be so many people that I will miss, that Aidan will miss and the kids have many people they will miss.
Monday, January 17, 2011
Chicken Creole Soup
Chicken Creole Soup
Prep Time: 25 minutes (Start to finish 1hr and 20 minutes.)
2 tablespoons butter or margarine
2 Medium onions, coarsely chopped (1 cup)
2 Medium stalks celery, coarsely chopped (1 Cup)
1 Medium green bell pepper, coarsely chopped (1 cup)
2 teaspoons finely chopped garlic
2 ½ lbs boneless skinless chicken breast cut into 1-inch pieces
¼ cup flour
4 cups reduced-sodium chicken broth
2 cans (14.5 oz each) diced tomatoes, undrained
2 dried bay leaves
1 teaspoon salt
½ teaspoon pepper
¼ teaspoon ground red pepper (Cayenne)
¼ teaspoon Paprika
1 cup uncooked rice
2 cups water
1. Melt butter in 5 to 6 quart Dutch oven over medium-high heat. Cook onions, celery, bell pepper, garlic and chicken in butter 7 to 9 minutes, stirring often, until onion is softened and chicken in no longer pink in center.
2. Stir in flour/ Cook 5 to 6 minutes, stirring constantly, until flour is light brown. Stir in remaining ingredients, except rice and water. Heat to a boiling; reduce heat to medium-low.
3. Cover and cook 25 to 20 minutes, stirring occasionally, until chicken is tender. Meanwhile, cook rice in water as directed on package, stir rice into soup. Remove bay leaves.
8 servings (1 ½ cups each).
350 cal
8 g Total fat
Sodium 540 mg
Cholesterol 95 mg
Carb 32g
Protein 37g
Prep Time: 25 minutes (Start to finish 1hr and 20 minutes.)
2 tablespoons butter or margarine
2 Medium onions, coarsely chopped (1 cup)
2 Medium stalks celery, coarsely chopped (1 Cup)
1 Medium green bell pepper, coarsely chopped (1 cup)
2 teaspoons finely chopped garlic
2 ½ lbs boneless skinless chicken breast cut into 1-inch pieces
¼ cup flour
4 cups reduced-sodium chicken broth
2 cans (14.5 oz each) diced tomatoes, undrained
2 dried bay leaves
1 teaspoon salt
½ teaspoon pepper
¼ teaspoon ground red pepper (Cayenne)
¼ teaspoon Paprika
1 cup uncooked rice
2 cups water
1. Melt butter in 5 to 6 quart Dutch oven over medium-high heat. Cook onions, celery, bell pepper, garlic and chicken in butter 7 to 9 minutes, stirring often, until onion is softened and chicken in no longer pink in center.
2. Stir in flour/ Cook 5 to 6 minutes, stirring constantly, until flour is light brown. Stir in remaining ingredients, except rice and water. Heat to a boiling; reduce heat to medium-low.
3. Cover and cook 25 to 20 minutes, stirring occasionally, until chicken is tender. Meanwhile, cook rice in water as directed on package, stir rice into soup. Remove bay leaves.
8 servings (1 ½ cups each).
350 cal
8 g Total fat
Sodium 540 mg
Cholesterol 95 mg
Carb 32g
Protein 37g
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